Monday, April 21, 2008

Long Distance Relationships

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When it came to asking my bridesmaids to stand for Mr. Pineapple and I at our wedding, I didn't do anything cute. I really wish I had, it didn't even occur to me. In fact, I was only able to ask one in person. Of the 5 bridesmaids in our wedding, only one lives in the same state as I do. My two very best friends from childhood live in West Palm Beach and Orlando, Florida. My sister and maid of honor lives in China Town, Manhattan. My bestest friend from college lives in Boston. Leaving Mr. Pineapple's dear friend from college the only lovely lady within arms reach.

At first, I didn't think it was really a big deal. All the girls were very excited about flying in to help me shop for my gown and coming up again for a party weekend and the wedding. I felt guilty, knowing they would have to buy so many plane tickets for my big day. I love them all dearly and I know they know I would do the same for them in a heartbeat.

As the planning continues I miss them so much. I didn't realize what it would feel like to bounce ideas about ribbon and candles off of Mr. Pineapple. He cares, but he trusts me and my judgment to the point where I don't get much constructive feedback. I want my friends here to say "Oh gees, that is going to look a little strange, don't you think?" or "Oh! How about using satin?!" My super crafty mother is also 1250 miles away. I call her anytime I get an idea and she gives me a few more, but I wish I could be with her and go to the craft store with her, wedding plan with her.

I have a few of my local friends who I have dubbed my honorary bridesmaids, including Jacki who is so sweet and offers to help in any way and Michael (also a groomsman) who is helping me scout out creative folks in his work field. I still feel bad asking for help from them, and guilty that Jacki wont be in the wedding. My other friends are all male and wonderful, but not into "wedding stuff."

All of these long distance relationships are why I began blogging. I wanted to have a forum where I could show my friends and family my ideas and get some feedback. They are also what lead me to Weddingbee, a dream resource for a bride seemingly going at it on her own.

Does anyone else feel alone in the planning process? Any suggestions on how I can include my ladies in the planning without burdening them?


Tiffany said...

I wish I knew - I have NO bridesmaids that are local. None. The closest one, my maid of honor, is in Cleveland. And because the wedding is in my hometown in NE Ohio, and we live in Pittsburgh, it makes wedding planning a real challenge. My mother and I have done almost everything. Scott gives his input, and people have offered to help. But with my wedding party living in Erie, Cleveland, Myrtle Beach, Chicago, and us living in Pittsburgh, and the wedding in Warren, Ohio - It's a situation where we don't have much a choice to do it all ourselves.

Emily said...

yeah it is tough, but honestly at this point I am so used to doing everything myself that I feel guilty when people offer to help.